Top 9 Worst Philippine Campaign Jingles

Simple infomercials for simple minds

In a month the 2016 Philippine General Elections will commence , phony promises will be made and stupid platforms will be advertised. The airwaves are probably jammed with infomercials, preventing you from watching this or this. Campaigning via television has long been an art form, from the time of  Kennedy vs. Nixon, whereas in America  the focus of a political ad is grounded on social issues. In the Philippines political strategists don't need to go the extra mile in having a logical campaign ad full of arguments and positions, since people are to damn stupid. In a nutshell political adds in the Philippines can be summarized with this. Now lets look back at the campaign jingles in recent memory that were bat shit awful.


So Here are the Top 9 Worst Philippine Campaign Jingles



9.) Turn My Name Into a Pun

Politician: Jambi Madrigal
Election Used: 2013 General Elections
Message sent: I love poor people and hate corrupt people! Vote for me!!
Message received: JAJAJAJAMBIII JAJAJAJAMBIIIII!!!!!
Result: Lost - 20th place

Up first is Jambi Madrigal, to be honest the message of this commercial actually ain't that bad, its concise and direct to the point. However its the 2nd half that halted the momentum, in Psychology we have a term called the recency effect, which means that we are more likely to remember and infuenced with what came last. So much for showing your qualifications just to have people remember, JAJAJAJAMBI!

8.) Anak ako ni FPJ, walang expereince? Nga pala sinabi ko na ba sayo na anak ako ni FPJ?

Politician: Grace Poe
Election Used: 2013 General Elections
Message sent: Anak ako ni FPJ iboboto niyo ako kasi idol niyo siya!
Message received: Anak siya ni FPJ! Iboboto ko siya!
Result: Won- 1st Place

This list will include some entries from candidates who have actually won in the elections due to the wrong reasons. Some might think that this should not be a part of this list as Grace Poe topped the 2013 Senatorial race, but since I'm an elitist wise crack its here. All this commercial said was that "anak siya ni FPJ" over and over again, and the Philippine feeble minded masa ate it up and ate it good.

7.) Look who I am related to! 

Politician: Bam Aquino
Election Used: 2013 General Elections
Message sent: I am related to him, him, and her so please vote for me!
Message received: BAM = Bobo ang Maniwala
Result: Won- 7th Place

This entry would probably offend your Titos and Titas from the baby boomer generation who lived through martial law and were at EDSA I. But lets face it, this commercial was horrendous, not even a single fucking platform was given.

6.) Please forget! Please forget!

Politician: Gringo Honasan
 Election Used: 2007 Philippine General Elections
Message sent: My son is here looking like a crying puppy, please forget that i tried to to overthrow the government after EDSA.
Message received: Uy wawa naman yung bata, ano pangalan ng tatay niya? Honasan? Uy tunog familiar boto ko nga chong....
Result: Won 10th Place

It amazes me how quick people forget his crimes throughout the 70s and the 80s. That a commercial  terribly made as this one can win an election.

5.) My Church-mates/Friends who you have no idea who, like me therefore you should to. 

Politician: Eddie Villanueva
Election used: 2010 Presidential Elections
Message sent: These people who hopefully you know like me, therefore you should to. Ohh and I like God.
Message received: Wait wait! Sino sila??? Tsaka,,,, sino ka??
Result: Lost -5th place 

Its extremely mind boggling that someone with the minuscule fame of Brother Eddie Villanueva ran for president not once but twice. The main bulk of his supporters and his confidence comes from his Jesus is Lord Church, which has about 4 million followers. But sadly he never realized in the grander scale that 4 million followers half of which did not even vote for him pales in comparison to the general population. All that being said, he hoped this commercial can turn the tide but sadly it failed. The video starts with a bunch of D-list nobodies, talking about how great he is and how he loves God, and it ends with him talking about God. Wow... To sum it up this video:

"Nobodies convincing nobodies to vote for a nobody"

clap..clap.. clap....


4.) Lets treat the Filipino people like kindergarten class! 

Politician:Joker Arroyo
Election Used: 2007 Philippine General Elections
Message sent: Good people are my allies and bad people are my enemy.
Message received: Kung good ako, ok ako, so kung bad ako.... ano nga pala yun?
Aftermath: Won- 7th Place

Ok lets try this again... kung good ako, ok ako, pero kung bad ako...... ok I give up.


3.) Mama I need help!

Politician: Noynoy Aquino
Election Used: 2007 General Elections
Message sent: My mama likes me so should you.
Message received: May anak na lalaki pala si Cory at Ninoy? Hmm may bakante pa balota ko, sige na nga.
Aftermath: Won- 6th place

Just like with "Bobo Ang Maniwala Aquino", this commercial gives ZERO substances, all appeal to emotion. Without Cory, Pnoy would be a nobody, and without Ninoy Cory would be a nobody. If you followed this article from the beginning, the Achilles heal of the Filipino people is the lack of critical thinking. What the hell were you all thinking?

2.) The Pedicab Fiasco

Politician: Mar Roxas
Election used: 2010 Presidential Elections
Message sent: We can do this together!
Message received:  Bro mukha kang tanga......
Result: Dropped out of the race, ran for vice president and lost.

Mar Roxas is back and running again for the highest office in the land. To be honest he may have the best platform, but for the love of Christ he has the worst PR team. In this commercial he is talking to a bunch of street children who are the victims of the lack of child labor laws, and it begins with him exploiting child labor by riding that pedicab. Then the commercials implodes into awkwardness as it ends with him leading an army of pedicabs  down a highway that in real life would have been a traffic disaster one in which he is constantly blamed for. What happened to Mr. Palengke? Hopefully now he has learned his lesson and hire a better PR team, oh never mind you're fucked.

1.) I'm Poor! Just like you!!! 

Politician: Manny Villar
Election used: 2010 General Elections
Message sent: Galing ako sa mahirap kaya iboto niyo ako
Message received: Ikaw mahirap???? Bleh di ka naman poor chong!!
Result: Lost - 3rd Place

No campaign blunder in the history of campaign commercials has destroyed a presidential bid like this one. It is human nature that when someone tries to hard sell something to you, you would automatically show doubt and bring some sort of resistance both relevant and irrelevant.

 In the 2010 presidential elections then Senator Manny Villar was wiping Mar Roxas on the floor in the polls with a comfortable lead, but when this led to this there was a huge panic in his camp. Rattled by the automatic superstar status of PNoy. Manny Villar's camp decided to change their approach. Instead of the moderate and reasonable campaign jingle that gave him the comfortable lead over Roxas. They decided to go all in on the "Hampas lupa ako tulad niyo" route which gave rise to the infamous "nakaligo ka na ba sa dagat ng basura" series of infomercials that came in such volume in local television that you would think that Pacquiao had a fight.

This made people doubt him being poor and even worse placed his finances under the microscope which was his Achilles heal. Various scandals most notably the C5 road extension issue rocked his campaign to the point of no return. He even lost to this guy who just got out of jail.


How about the greatest campaign jingle in Philippine election history?

Politician: Ramon Magsaysay
Election used: 1953 General Elections
Message sent: We need democracy and honest government, I am your guy, plus listen to this catchy tune.
Message received:  We need this guy! And this tune rocks!
Result: Won-1st Place

Just listen to it, nuff said.